Parshas Vayeitzei 5786: Daven for Others - Creating Keys to Unlock the Chests

 Torah Parallels 

Parshas Toldos 

לעילוי נשמת האדא בת מרדכי 

Daven for Others – Creating Keys to Unlock the Chests  

The Torah (30:20-21) relates that after Leah had given birth to six of the shevatim and Bilhah and Zilpah each had two shevatim, Leah was pregnant with yet another child. She gave birth to a daughter and named her Dinah. Rashi writes based on Chazal that Leah named her Dinah, from the root word “judgement”, because of the judgement she made for herself. She knew from Ruach HaKodesh that 12 shevatim were destined to be born to Yaakov. Originally, it was assumed that the distribution would be equal across Rachel, Leah, Bilhah and Zilpah, but at this point with Leah already having six and each of the maidservants having two, that only left a maximum of two shevatim to be born. So when Leah was pregnant again, she realized that if she were to have a seventh son, Rachel would be left with only one son, fewer than the maidservants who each had two. She therefore davened that the fetus should be switched to a girl.  

 

The very next passuk says that Hashem remembered Rachel....and she became pregnant and gave birth to Yosef. Rashi comments that the Torah uses the phrase “Hashem remembered” because Rachel had a particular special zechus that she gave the simanim (signs) to Leah. Earlier in the parsha when Yaakov was going to marry Rachel, he knew that Lavan might try to trick him, so he arranged signs with Rachel so he could be sure it was her. When Lavan brought Leah to be married first, Rachel gave her the signs so that she wouldn’t be embarrassed. This was the zechus that Hashem was “recalling” when answering Rachel’s tefillah.  

 

Rashi is clearly addressing the terminology of the passuk, but the immediate juxtaposition of Rachel becoming pregnant right after the passuk of Dinah’s birth also seems deliberate. What is the connection between the passukim? Why did Dina’s birth seemingly have to come before Hashem remembering Rachel’s zechus of providing Leah with the simanim? 

 

The Maharal (Gur Aryeh) addresses this. He first asks: how could Leah daven for such a miraculous event to change the gender of the baby after it was a formed fetus? The Gemara  (Niddah 31a) tells us that after 40 days, the fetus’ gender is already fixed and therefore davening for it to be a specific gender would be a tefillas shav (prayer in vain)? The Sifsei Chochomim simply answers that she davened within the first 40 days. The Maharal however has difficulty with that answer, as he maintains that Leah was actually meant to have another male child. Therefore, had she davened “too early” for it to not be a boy, while the timing would have been more appropriate from a tefillah perspective, she would have lost the pregnancy altogether. She therefore had to wait for the son to actually be formed - specifically after the 40 days of pregnancy, and only then did she daven for the neis (miracle) to switch the gender so that Rachel could have the potential to have the two remaining shevatim that were to be born. The Maharal then says something so crucial: in the merit of both Rachel and Leah together, the fetus was able to transform. 

 

Such powerful words. The Maharal is clearly suggesting that while Rachel held the incredible zechus she had of giving Leah the simanim and sparing her from embarrassment, it was only the combination with Leah’s tefillah for Rachel that opened shaa’rei shamayim (the Gates of Heaven) to grant Rachel her wish to merit having two shevatim come from her.  

 

What an incredible lesson and an incredible mechayev for us to learn from. Davening for others is such a powerful and essential form of compassion and tefillah. The Medrash (Beraishis Rabbah) and the Gemara (Rosh Hashana 11a) mention that there were three women who were childless who were answered on Rosh Hashanah: Sarah, Rachel, and Chanah. Sarah, as we know, was tormented by Hagar. Rashi (16:4) writes that after Hagar and Avraham had Yishmael, she harshly said, “Sarah isn’t as righteous as she presents to be. All these years she didn’t merit to have children while I was able to have Yishmael right away with Avraham.”  

 

Chana too suffered while unable to have children. The Navi (Shmuel A 1:6-7) relates that Peninah, Elkanah’s other wife, would provoke Chanah year after year asking “where are your children?” The Gemara (Bava Basra 16a) tells us that in contrast with Hagar, Peninah had good intentions. She specifically made these comments to Chanah to make her feel bad with the intent that in turn Chanah would daven even harder (if that’s even imaginably possible). The Ben Yehoyada comments on the Gemara that it must have been that Elkanah was in on it too and knew what Peninah was trying to do, otherwise how would he be able to witness such torment and remain silent?  Although this may sound extreme, it reflects a familiar pattern. When people feel helpless to assist someone practically, they sometimes resort to pointing out contrasts or deficiencies, imagining it will inspire improvement. Yet these well-intentioned remarks often wound more than they heal. 

 

Leah’s approach was completely different. Rather than acting like a Hagar, which she could have felt emotionally entitled to do as the “second best” wife  (the Torah actually refers to Leah as “the hated one” relative to the love Yaakov had for Rachel!), and rather than taking the approach of Peninah, she did what is most obvious and most helpful, yet not always people’s immediate reaction – simply daven for Rachel. And it worked. As the Maharal says: In the combined zechus of Leah and Rachel, Rachel had a son. Remember, Rachel had her own zechus, yet it was the combination of tefillah that brought about the actualization of the zechus.  

 

We all have an achrayus (responsibility) to look around – people who need parnassah, shidduch, children, refuah, shalom, hatzlacha, ruchniyus, etc etc – and daven for them. Choose someone. Have in mind a family member, have in mind a stranger. Let’s learn from Leah and help actualize the tremendous zechusim across k’lal yisroel that are just waiting for an outside tefillah to join together with in order to bring the zechusim into reality.  

 

May Hashem answer all of our tefillos for ourselves and others l’tovah b’meheirah!